New Year, New You

With New Year’s Eve upon us, many take the time to reflect on the past year.  For some of us 2013 was as cursed as the number 13 promises to be, so we look forward to 2014.  But all of us fondly reminisce about the high points of the year, and learn life’s tough lessons from the low.  The resolutions of many to work out more often flood our gyms with users in January, and as the masses settle into their routines around February, the resolution is a faded memory.  This is an all too familiar habit of New Year’s resolutions and promises to ourselves; we make them as fast as we break them.  Is this proof that we are non-committal people?  I don’t think that’s true.  We simply need to commit to ourselves and commit to making our resolutions habitual practices.

Take for instance showering, or brushing your teeth.  You typically don’t think twice about not doing either of those things.  It’s easy to make the excuse that it’s built into your daily routine and you are committed to doing them because if you didn’t it would negatively impact you.  As you make your resolutions aren’t you trying to resolve to do things that make you a better person and that would negatively impact you without it?  I agree it is easier said than done because life happens to derail you from your plans, but the important thing to remember is you must make a commitment to yourself and hold yourself accountable.

Don’t worry about creating a big fancy resolution to impress your friends, which ends up being so lofty that you’ve put yourself in a difficult situation to stay true to it.  The reality is, you don’t have to impress anyone with your resolution.  If your resolution is small, but it’s something that helps you have a successful 2014 and future, then go for it!  Make that your resolution and make a plan of how to incorporate it into your daily routine.  It might change your current lifestyle a bit, but it will help you be a better person and that’s what’s important.

As you reflect on 2013 and look forward to what 2014 has in store, I will leave you with lessons that I’ve learned and placed in my blogs from 2013 that I plan to use to help me have a successful 2014 and hopefully they can help you too.  (Links to the pertinent blog have been placed in each item) 

HAPPY NEW YEAR, and HAPPY NEW YOU!

1.      “Water Your Own Grass”.  Cultivate what you have in your own life.  We think the grass is always greener on the other side.  Instead, look in your own backyard, the grass might be greener than you think it is if you take the time to cultivate it instead of wishing you had someone else’s.

2.      Start with yourself to be a good leader.  There is no ‘I’ in team but there is a ‘me’.  In order to build a successful team, and be a good leader it starts with the person you see every day, yourself.  “Coaching at Work”

3.      “Take the First Step” There are many different things that you will tell yourself you can’t do.  But put those negative thoughts out of your head, and be prepared to take the first step.  There is always a fear of failing, but you might embark on a new and successful journey.

4.      “Be Vulnerable”.  It’s difficult to let your guard down, and open up to others, but it’s important that you take the time to be authentic with them.  It’s risky and sometimes it can be painful, but in many other instances it leads to more authentic relationships, and cultivates stronger bonds.

5.      “Go the Distance”.  In life, preparation can lead to success when you least expect it.  You will be able to go farther than you expected much like Meredith Fitzmaurice if you are persistent, determined, and prepared.  You will shock yourself with what you can achieve.

6.     Find the Silver Lining. There are unexpected moments in life and circumstances that will try to derail you from your goals.  You are responsible for your future and can overcome anything.  Find the silver lining, use that as your motivation to prevail. “When Life Happens”

7.      Give to others.  We all live in communities where there are people less fortunate that ourselves.  It’s important that we show compassion and give back to our communities while being thankful for the things that we have in our own lives.   “Thanks and Giving”

8.      “You Are Your Own CEO”.  You’re responsible for yourself to accomplish your goals, achieve greatness and represent yourself.  Look for support from those who will be on your board of directors to give you praise and share constructive criticism to help you be who you want to be.

9.      “Don’t Quit”.  Life will throw you curve balls, and can be difficult.  You should always be prepared and have a positive attitude that it’s not over until it’s actually over.  With a prepared mind and strong persistence you will be ready for success when the opportunity presents itself.

10.   “Your Friends are Your Future”.  We’ve all heard the crabs in a barrel cliché.  But conversely if you surround yourself with positive people striving for greatness instead of pulling you down, they will push you up.  Sometimes we allow ourselves to knowingly get pulled down because it’s easier to keep the negativity around rather than do what’s difficult and cut it out of our lives.

11.   “What’s your Legacy?” Make sure that when you are doing something regardless of where you are, that you are leaving behind a trail of greatness.  You have an impact with every endeavor you embark on, so let your influence be a great and positive one.

12.   Don’t worry about the trophy.  Most people remembered over the course of time aren’t remembered for the trophy that they won.  Work hard not for the award, but because it’s the right thing to do, and you want to have a positive impact.  The awards will come, and people will forget what you won, but they won’t forget your impact.  “A Thought on Leadership”

 

 

Don't Quit

This past Thanksgiving Weekend was filled with some of the most exciting endings to college and NFL football games.  The most memorable was the end of the Auburn versus Alabama game, which has saturated almost every news and media outlet for the past few days.  I bring up this college football game not to exhaust an already fatigued sports news story, but because it serves as a classic example of why we should never give up, even if it seems like the game is over.

If you haven’t seen it, the Auburn win came on a last second, long range field goal attempt by Alabama, with both teams tied and braced for the possibility of going into overtime.  Auburn put one person in the end zone to catch the field goal if Alabama missed it short.  It was a heads up ‘let’s be prepared for any type of situation’ play calling mentality that gave them the win.  This attitude that the game isn’t over until the clock says zero is the mindset that we need to carry with us every day.  In life your game might be a job hunt, starting a business, or another circumstance you face where not continuing to try means the difference between quitting and success.

All too often many of us get caught up in convincing ourselves that our circumstances are too monumental to overcome and we give up.  We might have been trying so hard, for so long at something, that frustration has set in from a lack of the results that we expect.  Just when it seems like we are at the end of our journey some of us choose to quit.  Not quitting at that instant in time makes successful people successful.  Just when successful people start to think their ‘game’ is over or feel frustration start to set in, instead of quitting, they push a harder to keep on going until they reach their goal.

Before Auburn won they were down two touchdowns to the number one team in the nation but they didn’t give up and neither should you.  Auburn put someone in the end zone in preparation for something good that might happen to help them win.  They took a chance even though the odds were stacked against them, and that’s what we should do with every opportunity.  We need to be ready to go, ready to take a chance, ready to finish strong and play hard through every last second regardless of the odds we face.  Had Auburn not been ready for opportunity to come their way in the form of a short missed field goal, that game probably wouldn’t be in the history books for the way it ended, and Auburn might not be in the SEC championship game. 

You too have to be ready for opportunity to strike in whatever form it may come to you, just like Auburn was.  Don’t give up and say I’ll get it next time.  Had Auburn adopted that thought process, they could have lost in overtime.  Fight until the very last second, and be prepared to put in extra effort just when it seems like it’s all over, because an opportunity might come your way.  When opportunity knocks, you need to make sure you’re ready with a welcome mat ready to let it come into your life.

Over the years I’ve shared a poem titled “Don’t Quit” written by an anonymous author with those I have supervised.  I would share it with them as motivation to keep working hard no matter what.  It’s my favorite poem to read for inspiration, and the last stanza which I have pasted below summarizes what I’m getting at with this week’s blog.
(You can Google “Don’t Quit poem” for the full version)

"Success is failure turned inside out–
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit–
It’s when things seem worst that you mustn’t quit."

Take the First Step

As I was watching HBO’s Real Sports they did a story on Nik Wallenda.  You might recognize his name as one of the most daring and famous tightrope walkers of our era.  He’s accomplished what many would describe as unimaginable, brave, and downright dangerous.  Some of his feats include crossing the Little Colorado River Gorge next to the Grand Canyon, as well as crossing Niagara Falls on a tight rope.  He holds an amazing 7 world records. 

Now the closest I’ve ever come to walking a tight rope is playing on a balance beam on the playground as a kid, so I’m no Nik.  But during that interview he mentioned two things that really stood out to me about how we live our lives, and how similar it is to what he accomplishes on the tight rope. 

He said the hardest part of some of his aerial stunts is taking the first step as he walks out onto the wire.  Once he’s past that, the jitters of starting are done, and he can concentrate on the intricacies of the rest of the act.

The truth is the first step really is the most difficult any time you start something new.  As school has started, the first step for a student into the hallway or on campus can be scary.  If you’ve decided you want to start a business, the first step of opening the store front and taking a leap of faith can be terrifying.  Sometimes it’s intimidating walking into the boss’s office to suggest a new initiative, starting a conversation with a significant other about something serious, or even starting a new job. 

The first step in all of these is scary for the same reason the first step is scary for Nik.  It’s a fear of the unknown and wondering: “What will the rest of the journey be like?” There’s also a fear of not succeeding and wondering: “Will I make it?” “Will I survive?”.  You’re human and those are natural feelings to have.  We have all felt that at one time while embarking on a new endeavor.  What Nik does is he practices frequently to anticipate the stunt and various scenarios that can happen on the wire in order to complete the act and diminish the odds of falling. 

In our own lives we must also prepare ourselves to diminish the danger of failing after that first step.  It comes down to preparedness and trusting in your preparedness.  We should constantly be putting in the work to make ourselves better and ready to succeed after that first step.  There will be obstacles that can’t be accounted for, but our preparation and keeping our mindset focused can help us overcome those and make it to the other end.  Nik prepares for gusts of wind on the rope high above natural wonders, but sometimes Mother Nature has a surprise for him.  But trusting in his preparation and staying focused on succeeding, he continues on much like we need to do when we’re faced with something unexpected.

The second statement that stuck with me is the fact that he doesn’t use a safety net or harness to perform.  He said, "My great-grandfather taught that safety nets offer a false sense of security,"  Going on to say that a safety net is no guarantee because an uncle of his was killed while performing, despite falling into a safety net.

All too often we are afraid to take that first step unless we are completely sure that we will be safe from failing.  Sometimes we hinder ourselves from trying something new because we fill our minds with: “What if it doesn’t work out?”.  Failing is a part of life and what we learn some of our most valuable lessons from.  If Nik subscribed to these thoughts he wouldn’t have 7 world records because he never would have taken that first step without a safety net.  I had a supervisor once share with me that paralysis by analysis can prevent us from moving forward in our lives if we get caught up worrying about the ‘what ifs’.  Overthinking something might be holding you back right now.  It takes a lot of courage to trust the process, and to trust your-self to make the best decisions.  Undoubtedly you’ve survived some very rough times, and bounced back stronger.  You’ve healed your wounds and gotten back up on that wire to take another first step to finish your journey.  That means you already know you’re a survivor.

Sometimes you will fail, just like sometimes Nik has fallen off that wire.  But he gets back up on it and tries again, and that’s what I know you can do.  If you’ve got a dream to chase, or you’re about to try something new or different, don’t be afraid to take the first step, and don’t worry if it doesn’t work out.  Just get back up on the wire after some more preparation, trust the process and take that first step again. 

You will make it to the other end of the wire. I know you can do it.

For those of you that are interested, here's a quick news story about Nik
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MX_jFK9Zf5k