New Year, New You

With New Year’s Eve upon us, many take the time to reflect on the past year.  For some of us 2013 was as cursed as the number 13 promises to be, so we look forward to 2014.  But all of us fondly reminisce about the high points of the year, and learn life’s tough lessons from the low.  The resolutions of many to work out more often flood our gyms with users in January, and as the masses settle into their routines around February, the resolution is a faded memory.  This is an all too familiar habit of New Year’s resolutions and promises to ourselves; we make them as fast as we break them.  Is this proof that we are non-committal people?  I don’t think that’s true.  We simply need to commit to ourselves and commit to making our resolutions habitual practices.

Take for instance showering, or brushing your teeth.  You typically don’t think twice about not doing either of those things.  It’s easy to make the excuse that it’s built into your daily routine and you are committed to doing them because if you didn’t it would negatively impact you.  As you make your resolutions aren’t you trying to resolve to do things that make you a better person and that would negatively impact you without it?  I agree it is easier said than done because life happens to derail you from your plans, but the important thing to remember is you must make a commitment to yourself and hold yourself accountable.

Don’t worry about creating a big fancy resolution to impress your friends, which ends up being so lofty that you’ve put yourself in a difficult situation to stay true to it.  The reality is, you don’t have to impress anyone with your resolution.  If your resolution is small, but it’s something that helps you have a successful 2014 and future, then go for it!  Make that your resolution and make a plan of how to incorporate it into your daily routine.  It might change your current lifestyle a bit, but it will help you be a better person and that’s what’s important.

As you reflect on 2013 and look forward to what 2014 has in store, I will leave you with lessons that I’ve learned and placed in my blogs from 2013 that I plan to use to help me have a successful 2014 and hopefully they can help you too.  (Links to the pertinent blog have been placed in each item) 

HAPPY NEW YEAR, and HAPPY NEW YOU!

1.      “Water Your Own Grass”.  Cultivate what you have in your own life.  We think the grass is always greener on the other side.  Instead, look in your own backyard, the grass might be greener than you think it is if you take the time to cultivate it instead of wishing you had someone else’s.

2.      Start with yourself to be a good leader.  There is no ‘I’ in team but there is a ‘me’.  In order to build a successful team, and be a good leader it starts with the person you see every day, yourself.  “Coaching at Work”

3.      “Take the First Step” There are many different things that you will tell yourself you can’t do.  But put those negative thoughts out of your head, and be prepared to take the first step.  There is always a fear of failing, but you might embark on a new and successful journey.

4.      “Be Vulnerable”.  It’s difficult to let your guard down, and open up to others, but it’s important that you take the time to be authentic with them.  It’s risky and sometimes it can be painful, but in many other instances it leads to more authentic relationships, and cultivates stronger bonds.

5.      “Go the Distance”.  In life, preparation can lead to success when you least expect it.  You will be able to go farther than you expected much like Meredith Fitzmaurice if you are persistent, determined, and prepared.  You will shock yourself with what you can achieve.

6.     Find the Silver Lining. There are unexpected moments in life and circumstances that will try to derail you from your goals.  You are responsible for your future and can overcome anything.  Find the silver lining, use that as your motivation to prevail. “When Life Happens”

7.      Give to others.  We all live in communities where there are people less fortunate that ourselves.  It’s important that we show compassion and give back to our communities while being thankful for the things that we have in our own lives.   “Thanks and Giving”

8.      “You Are Your Own CEO”.  You’re responsible for yourself to accomplish your goals, achieve greatness and represent yourself.  Look for support from those who will be on your board of directors to give you praise and share constructive criticism to help you be who you want to be.

9.      “Don’t Quit”.  Life will throw you curve balls, and can be difficult.  You should always be prepared and have a positive attitude that it’s not over until it’s actually over.  With a prepared mind and strong persistence you will be ready for success when the opportunity presents itself.

10.   “Your Friends are Your Future”.  We’ve all heard the crabs in a barrel cliché.  But conversely if you surround yourself with positive people striving for greatness instead of pulling you down, they will push you up.  Sometimes we allow ourselves to knowingly get pulled down because it’s easier to keep the negativity around rather than do what’s difficult and cut it out of our lives.

11.   “What’s your Legacy?” Make sure that when you are doing something regardless of where you are, that you are leaving behind a trail of greatness.  You have an impact with every endeavor you embark on, so let your influence be a great and positive one.

12.   Don’t worry about the trophy.  Most people remembered over the course of time aren’t remembered for the trophy that they won.  Work hard not for the award, but because it’s the right thing to do, and you want to have a positive impact.  The awards will come, and people will forget what you won, but they won’t forget your impact.  “A Thought on Leadership”

 

 

Watering Your Own Grass

After you read the title for this you might be wondering if I’ve turned in my typing thumb for a green thumb after only one post.  Well, my parents are the better gardeners in the family, so I’ll leave that to them.  The title refers to a meme I saw while scrolling through Facebook inspired me to reexamine a cliché.  (a meme is where a phrase is typically superimposed on a picture).  It took the cliché “The grass is always greener on the other side.” and flipped it on its head.  It said “The grass is greener, where you water it.”

Now it doesn’t take a horticulturist to figure out something as obvious as a plant is greener due to more water.  But it made me think, what if we on a daily basis really applied this meme to our lives the way we typically fall into the trap of the cliché.  I know I’ve been guilty of the thought on quite a few occasions that: “the grass is greener on the other side”.  However as I reflect on the words within the meme, was I really noticing my own grass, and was I cultivating it to be as green as ‘the other side’?  In addition to that, was the grass I was seeing in the proverbial ‘over there’ truly as green as it initially seemed?

I reflected on the times I had wished I was someone else, or had someone else’s position in life.  Occasions that came to mind were watching my friends get married while I was single wishing it was me, driving past multi-million dollar homes wishing I was living there, or even as a young child I can sometimes remember thinking “I wish I had a sibling” (I’m still an only child…um...well adult. But you know what I mean).  I’m sure that at some point, you’ve had a similar line of thinking, or maybe you have it frequently, I’m not here to judge you.  I can tell you that even the most self-confident person has that little green monster of envy rearing its ugly head from time to time evoking the thought “Wow. I wish that was me.”  There is however a danger here when we begin to buy in to this line of thinking.  For some people this envy can lead to resentment toward their situation or worse, resentment toward special people in their lives.  Quite often in those other situations the grass isn’t really that much greener and there are a lot of unseen circumstances that might not be too great that has led to what we deem as ‘greener grasses’. 

I want to encourage you to take the time to water your own grass to make it greener like the meme says.  Take time to be thankful for the things in your own life that you’re truly thankful for.  If you don’t know where to start I will share some suggestions with you to help get you started at the end of this post.  Even if you believe your life situation isn’t the most ideal, I promise you, that you still have green grass to enjoy.  Sometimes that situation you’re looking at isn’t meant for you at that time in your life.  On other occasions you might be missing out on the benefits of your own situation and some really great memorable moments or opportunities because you’re too worried wishing you had someone else’s.

I will concede that there is a thin line here where some people would assert “But it’s just my goal to live in a house or drive a car, etc. like that. What’s wrong with that?”  There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.  Having a goal is something completely different and that’s where watering your own grass comes into play.  Taking the time to assess your situation and what decisions you can make to better yourself or your situation to reach your goal is a substantial way of watering your grass.  Don’t just say I wish that was me.  Look at your situation and make a plan to reach your goals.  Sometimes it takes small goals which can lead to you accomplishing your larger goals.  Finding the things you are thankful for is another way of watering, and it may help you realize that your grass is greener than you originally thought.

I promised to share some suggestions as a sprinkler to help you get started on watering your own grass and you can find those simple tips below.  They might even inspire you to think of other ways.  I have faith in you.  You can make your grass greener, so go for it!!!

Tips for watering your own grass:

1.       Put a notepad next to your bed.  Before you go to sleep write down something good that happened to you during that day.  It can be as simple as I got my favorite parking spot.  After a while you’ll have a record of positive things that have happened to you that you can look at when you’re feeling not so positive.

2.       When you wake up in the morning say to yourself three times “Today is going to be a good day.”  Putting yourself in a positive mindset first thing in the morning will affect the decisions you make all day

3.       Think of an activity that makes you happy and feel good about yourself.  Make a plan to make that activity happen more than once, or on a regular basis.

4.       Think of someone you shared a great memory with that you haven’t talked to in a while and reach out to them to relive that memory.  Do this on multiple occasions with different people you know.  You’ll be able to reconnect with friends and share a good laugh.

5.       Figure out a way to laugh at least twice in a day.  Whether it’s watching a YouTube video, retelling a story, watching a funny movie, etc. There is plenty of scientific research that says laughing is good for your health.

6.       Make a list of 10 things you’re thankful for in your life.  If there are people on your list, take the time to tell them.

7.       If you find yourself saying “I wish that was me”, take the time to write down some concrete steps (big and small) that you can take to make that you.  Then follow through on those steps.  Soon your grass really will be greener. 

Happy Watering!