Life Lessons from Soccer

Soccer is a sport that I grew up watching, loving and playing.  With World Cup 2014 happening in Brazil right now, I find myself fondly reminiscing of my own experiences playing the sport, while being fully enthralled in watching games and highlights.  Playing the sport has taught me a lot of life lessons and concepts of team, team management, and leadership.  I felt that it was fitting for this week’s post to share my soccer-influenced insights on those topics during what is easily the largest, most impactful, and most watched sporting event worldwide.  If you’re not a fan of the sport, hopefully you’ll have a different appreciation for it after reading this.

The way that shot taking and scoring a goal occurs in soccer, is very similar to the way an employee team approaches a goal in the workplace or another situation.  While watching a game you’ll notice the amount of passing among the teammates much like different parts of a project get passed between employees contributing to a larger goal.  In a team work situation sometimes there are big surges forward in the process of completing a major project, but sometimes it’s important to pull back, regroup, and approach the goal from a different angle, because the first strategy might not be as successful as another one.  This is similar to how a team in soccer will build up to taking a shot on the field.  You’ll notice that there are a lot of forward passes, but sometimes it’s necessary to stop, pass it backward, reposition the players and then approach the goal in a different way on the other side of the field.

You’ll also notice that in soccer there are no time outs, the clock doesn’t stop and players don’t get a break.  As a player on the field, I was very familiar with conditioning and preparing for the long haul of playing non-stop.  In this role, you have to be ready to take on any challenges from people trying to keep you from achieving your goal of scoring and it’s essential to keep pressing on even if you’re tired.  This is such a straightforward and clear analogy for life.  Life doesn’t stop just because you’re tired or beat down from the challenges you’ve endured.  If you give up it will keep going without you, and you’ll be left out.  Most importantly, while focusing on life goals, you prepare yourself for the challenges you’ll face, and for the experiences you’ll have so that you can persevere under any circumstance for the long haul, just like conditioning for a soccer game.  It’s important to push beyond your comfort zones on a regular basis just like you would in a workout, because when it comes time for the true test, or ‘game time’, as it’s sometimes referred to, you’ll have to have the stamina to keep going and achieve the goal to be successful.

Learning how to fit on a team is another truly great lesson I’ve learned from playing soccer over the years.  I’ve played mostly as a forward or some will call it a striker when I played soccer (it’s the position that’s very offensive minded, shooting, scoring goals, etc.)  While this position is very offensive minded, depending on the situation or the team we were playing against, sometimes I would have to get pulled back into the midfield area to help out my teammates.  There were also situations where if we were playing a really great offensive team and if they were kicking a corner kick (when the team trying to score kicks it in play from the flag in the corner) I would be pulled back to help out on defense a bit.  The scenarios are endless but the point is that sometimes even though I was assigned a specific role I had to be flexible to help out the team in the way that they needed me at the right time, and other players on the team had to do the same thing. 

Quite often it is up to the player in the moment to make the decision of “How can I help the team be better and what do they need from me right now?”  This is not at all dissimilar from being on a team in a work/committee/organization situation.  In order to help the team out it’s necessary to be willing to help those other teammates out to complete a task or project, and support them.  Being inflexible on the field can result in a negative effect such as the other team scoring because someone was left open.  Much like in a teamwork situation being inflexible can lead to the team not completing the project.  The most important thing to understand on the field is that I am helping to pass the ball contributing to the process of shooting, scoring and winning, so I’m just as important to the team as anyone else.  That’s what teamwork is about, it’s about advancing the team, not about gaining all the glory.

The biggest gripe that many people have about soccer is the lack of scoring.  It’s not uncommon to have a final score of 1-0, 0-0 or 2-0 after 90 (plus a couple few) minutes of playing.  The reality is that this works much like achieving goals in our everyday lives.  It’s very easy to put a lot of hard work an effort into something just to achieve one or two results.  Then you focus on your next major achievement (the next game) and put a lot of time and effort into that.  Sometimes you achieve your objective or score one or two goals in a game, and sometimes you end up with zero or needing to try again harder the next time.  In the end it’s all a part of the process of getting better.

As you can see soccer has taught me a lot that I’ve applied to many different work and leadership positions.  The list could go on, but I wanted to highlight just a few of them.  Some of you reading this might feel that theater, playing in a band or another sport has taught you some of your own lessons.  I think that’s great and all the more reason that we should regularly have kids involved in such activities because of the transferable lessons that can be attained from such experiences.  There are a lot more World Cup matches to be watched, and hopefully what I’ve shared here can help you appreciate or think of the game in a different way. 

 

Learning from Lacey's Legacy

The morning of April 9, 2014 many people awoke to the news that Lacey Holsworth, an 8 year old little girl in Michigan had died of cancer around 1:00am that morning.  People who have never met Lacey were saddened by her passing and felt that they themselves had lost a loved one.  While it is always sad when someone dies, especially a child, many felt connected to her touching story because it unfolded very publicly after an encounter in 2012 at Sparrow Hospital with Michigan State basketball star Adreian Payne.  The two formed an immediate bond which strengthened and grew over time.  As many learned of her battle with cancer, there was an outpouring of love and support showed to her and her family from total strangers.  You didn’t have to be a Spartan fan, to be a fan of Lacey cheering her on through her battle with Neuroblastoma.  Princess Lacey (a nickname she affectionately took on) was such a young spirit, but there are so many great lessons that we can learn from her. 

All too often, we get caught up in the hype and bravado that we have to be a well-known, wealthy or highly influential person to make a difference or be important.  Lacey taught us that significance comes in all sizes and ages.  As an 8 year old little girl she lived her life with courage, and had a tremendous positive influence on others.  A pebble can be dropped in a pond and even though it’s not the biggest rock there will be a ripple effect created.  This can positively influence the lives of others, so it’s not always necessary to be the biggest, loudest voice in the room, just the most genuine. 

When Lacey was sitting in Sparrow Hospital in 2012 recovering from surgery, she had no specific laid out plans to cut down a net at the Big Ten Championship game, watch Adreian Payne in the dunk contest in Dallas, TX, or go on the Today Show and Good Morning America.  Would it be cool?  Of course.  But Lacey was living her life, determined to smile through her discomfort and the life altering difficulties that cancer presented.  That determination lead to her building a bond with Adreian Payne, which lead to inspiring a whole basketball team, and eventually others across the nation.  Lacey was creating her own ripple effect by being herself.

Lacey’s determination and courage to keep smiling and make the most out of her days is something else that we all can learn from.  It’s easy to get caught up in the complaints of our daily lives because something isn’t going right, or it’s not going the way we planned it.  This isn’t to mitigate the serious nature of what’s happening, but it’s too easy for that negativity to consume us and dictate how we interact with those we love and others.  I’ve been guilty of it on certain occasions myself, so you won’t find any finger pointing here.  But what if we shifted our perspective a bit and took the time to be thankful for what we have in our lives?  What if we approached each day being thankful for being able to see the sun rise, thankful for having people in our lives who love us, and looking for the silver lining of different moments? 

Lacey was grateful for each day she had, because she never knew what day would be her last.  She always had a smile on her face whenever the camera would show her in the stands at a game, or when strangers would ask for pictures with her, even though she had so much going on in her life.  If we approached life with a little more gratefulness would our interactions with others change, would we enjoy the little moments a bit more, and not take so much for granted?

The legacy that Lacey has left behind will be impossible to measure.  She touched the lives of so many people and will continue to remain in the hearts of many.  A vigil at MSU in her memory brought out droves of people in and outside of the community many of whom signed a famous landmark rock on Michigan State University’s campus.  The rock usually gets repainted with something new every 24 hours, from student group names, to events, to proposals, etc., but that same message in her memory (pictured below) has been there since April 9^th with more and more people making the journey to sign it with prayers, words of encouragement for the family, and messages of love.  Her story has inspired ESPN sports analyst Dick Vitale a long-time advocate for cancer research to set up a research fund in her name (click here). 

Lacey was just a child, but the way she lived embodied the words of a former famous basketball coach Jim Valvano who died of cancer as well, “Cancer can take away all my physical abilities. It cannot touch my mind, it cannot touch my heart and it cannot touch my soul. And those three things are going to carry on forever.”

While you or I may not have cancer, if we live like Lacey with courage genuineness and determination, and love like Lacey (like it says at the bottom of the rock), while staying true to ourselves, we can leave our lasting impression on the world, and fully enjoy each and every day.

Birthday Reflections

With my birthday coming up this week, it arrives in a familiar coincidental timing with New Year’s Day.  I say that because typically I use both occasions to reflect on the past while focusing on my future.  As I look back with this birthday, I have a sense of pride on the things I’ve accomplished and heed the lessons that experience has taught me as a constant pupil in the classroom of life.  This week I decided to share with you a few lessons learned translate from my childhood.

“When sledding look for the steepest slope.” – As a youth in Michigan, sledding was a staple of the childhood experience.  The most perfect hill was in Spartan Village where my family lived, and the best part was there were different slopes within that one hill.  I always went for the steepest one because it meant I could go faster, even though it was a little scary.  I learned from this thrill seeking joyride to take big risks.  It might be a little scary at first, but with great risk comes great reward, and it could be one of the most thrilling, enjoyable experiences. 

“I want the Mickey Mouse Santa.” – My first trip to Disney World was during Christmas of 1985.  My parents and I entered very early as the gates opened, and left when the park closed to not miss out on a minute there.  Before exiting, my parents asked me if I wanted to get anything to remember the visit.  Yes. I wanted a Mickey Mouse dressed as Santa that I had seen in a gift shop in the morning.  Unfortunately my 5 year old brain was so overwhelmed with Disney happiness that I didn’t know which store I saw it in.  During a frantic search as the park closed, the Mickey I wanted was eventually found.  I took to heart that sometimes the happiness of another person takes patience and giving of yourself.  My parents could have easily given up after the first 5 places, but they kept at it to make me happy.  When you love someone whether it’s familial, romantic or friendly, patience is required, as well as sometimes going out of your way to make them happy even if it isn’t the most convenient of circumstances.

“You can take one toy to church.” – My parents took me to church pretty regularly as a kid and I wasn’t the most stationary of children.  My mom (a child rearing wizard to handle me) figured out that if I had a toy to quietly sit with in my lap, I could easily make it through with no disturbance.  Toys in church? Awesome!  Let’s take them all!  Well, my mom regulated it to one to avoid making the pew look like a Toys ‘R Us exploded.  It was a simple task but every Sunday I focused on making a choice and sticking with my decision.  There was no turning back for a different toy.  I learned to make choices decisively and wisely because I would have to live with them.  I might figure out that I didn’t like the last decision, but I could learn to make a better decision for the next time the opportunity presented itself.  If for some reason it doesn’t, then I could make the best of a bad situation.

“The toothpaste tube isn’t empty, there’s still a little bit left.” – My favorite Looney Tunes Toothpaste was finished.  I didn’t want it to be done because I’d have to borrow my parents’ gross adult one with not the same flavor.  So I kept quiet and when I had to brush my teeth again I squeezed until my little fingers couldn’t squeeze anymore and I made that toothpaste last.  Just when I thought it was over and done, I keep trying, and keep pushing.  It wasn’t over like I thought it was.  I could still be successful and reap the rewards by not giving up.

“That’s so much Ice Cream!” – It was my birthday, and my parents took me to a place in Jackson, MI called the Ice Cream Parlor for my favorite dessert.  This place had an item on their menu called the “Dare to be Great”.  All I knew was that it had more scoops of ice cream than I had fingers and toes.  The server walked out of the kitchen with this item, and as our server got closer my jaw hit the table when it was placed in front of me and my parents sang Happy Birthday.  We attacked that ice cream with a vengeance and I’ll never forget it.  I shared that moment with my parents and we still laugh about how crazy that dessert was.  When it comes to special moments or things that are special to you share it with the ones you care about.  Make a good memory of it even if it seems like a small gesture.  If you share it with those you care about, it will mean that much more.

“Dad we need more acorns.” – The campus of Michigan State University has an abundance of squirrels and Oak trees.  As a child I didn’t fully understand that animals forage, and believed that I needed to help them get food just like my parents gave me food.  My Dad would help me collect acorns to put out by our apartment for the squirrels to have.  A daunting task with him knowing full well the squirrels would be fine, but this was quality time together.  It didn’t cost anything, and great memories were made.  I learned that bonding moments aren’t usually scripted they just spontaneously happen.  It goes back to sharing memories and sharing interests with those that you care about.  Sometimes the most meaningful moments don’t have to be the most expensive, lavish experiences.  Sure sometimes they are, but sometimes it’s just a simple activity that you do together regularly that makes it meaningful.

I look forward to what my 34th year has in store for me.  I’m sure there will be many more lessons and many more memories to be made.  Most importantly though, I’m thankful for the years of life I have had, the people in my life and I anticipate a bright future.